August 8th, 2013
When I awoke at 6:36 my husband was already awake and searching for clothes suitable for job interviews. When he found the shirt he was looking for, I ironed it as he requested.
Continue reading “Reconciliation – Day 8 (Reflexes)”
August 7th, 2013
My husband stirred at exactly 7:30 and I said “time to get up”, but I was sure he was getting up anyway. I had been up since maybe 6:50. He got up to get ready to go. I struggled between what I wanted to do, felt I should do, and what I felt like doing.
Continue reading “Reconciliation – Day 7 (Precautions)”
August 6th, 2013
It was close to 6:30. I answered a text I received from my sister last night. She asked what I was doing up so early.
Continue reading “Reconciliation- Day 6 (Therapy)”
August 5th, 2013
I awoke late. It was about 7am. I’m in the country, but failure to buy a rooster probably isn’t an excuse. I am sure I would have been up before sunrise if my mind wasn’t so active last night or if I got a dose of love from my husband.
Continue reading “Reconciliation- Day 5 (Sulking)”
August 4, 2013
I felt light in the room and awoke, it was a little after 6am. I added a few more details to yesterday’s entry and posted it as my husband was being nosy. He asked what the kids were going to eat. The cereal was all gone. I said, “I don’t know.. Pancakes?” He said, “Yeah! Make me some pancakes and sausage!” I said, “no no no.”
Continue reading “Reconciliation- Day 4 (Shot Down)”
August 1st, 2013
My husband arrived around 4pm. He walked in because the door was unlocked. I was cleaning the freezer. I dropped what I was doing and hugged him with my arms around his neck. We took all our 5 kids and went to Ruby Tuesday. I wanted nothing off that menu and everything was too expensive to pick something I was almost sure I wouldn’t like.
Continue reading “Reconciliation- Day 1 (Arrival)”
Before I ever saw him I had an instant crush like I was drawn to him, but I made no move. I argued with myself about approaching him and logic won. He was obviously much older, probably married, likely not interested, and I had a boyfriend.
Continue reading “Started as a Crush”
You know what’s scary? My husband is the only one I let get close to me. Now I’m tired of feeling vulnerable and I want to run so I can shut down my emotion and be alone for the rest of my life. He isn’t letting me run. He’s right there holding my hand.
Continue reading “Shaking with Fear”