Oh… god. Now I’ve got my husband threatening to spank me. He usually just takes a firm tone with me.
I asked him to call me every morning before work because it’s too hard not to talk to him all day, but I’m not supposed to be awake when he calls. Today I was awake and he can tell when I’m awake. He called at about 5:25am. He asked what time I went to bed. I told him about 3am. He said, “WHAT?” I cringed like I’d been caught. I waited for the imaginary echo to fade. Then I said that I’d fallen asleep early and woke up at around 11:30pm. He asked if I have a belt for him to spank me with. I moaned and said “yes.” (But he doesn’t need mine, he has his own.) He said, “YES?” I waited for that echo to fade. I said “yes” again. He asked where I got it. I said “Walmart.” (It’s good he didn’t ask what I use it for.) He said “Make sure to keep it handy.” I said “okay.” By the time he arrives I plan to have at least a paddle as well. I think he just plans to spank me for not sleeping as I was told. If I were to count potential reasons, they’d be:
1) Not sleeping enough
2) Blocking his number sometimes
3) Not eating enough
4) Any weight I’ve lost
5) Not communicating with him
6) My negative attitude
7) Not understanding why he loves me
8) Not caring about myself
9) If he finds out about my online master (who has no time for me. And my master can add guilt to HIS list.- that’s 7. Why am I digging a hole for myself? Lol)
10) Not getting out of the house as he keeps telling me.
11) Not leaving a voicemail when I called him. (This has been a rule for about 2 weeks now.)
He lives 1000 miles away so I’ve got at least until August 9th.